There’s no doubt we’ve been through an extremely stressful time. The stress and anxiety from working from home, juggling careers, kids, school and house chores is at an overwhelming level right now. And whether the stress stems from work, the kids, roles and responsibilities, or finances, one thing is for certain….it all has a direct affect on your marriage. All of these types of stress can make even the strongest marriages crumble a bit. You or your partner may have questioned the state of your relationship during this pandemic. It’s unsettling to wonder what if something is wrong with your relationship and how it will ever get back on track. Relationships are hard on their own. And let’s face it, we aren’t meant to spend THIS much time together, are we? If you're feeling this way, you are not alone. EVERYBODY is weathering the same storm and we’re all doing the best we can.
So what exactly can you do to reconnect and keep your relationship from faltering any further during this challenging time? There are ways, and there is hope……
Ways To Reconnect During Quarantine
Make time for yourselves- Time away from our loved ones is not only healthy but also gives us a chance to care for ourselves a bit. Encourage your partner to have their own “me time” to read, exercise or even play video games.
Get outdoors together - Being outdoors naturally relaxes the stress hormones in our bodies. Whether alone or with your partner, make sure to spend some time outdoors.
“Recreate” date night - Plan a dinner without kids, plan a movie without kids, plan an outdoor walk. It may not be what it used to be like, but we need to open ourselves to new ideas. Too often we focus on what we CAN’T do as opposed to what we CAN do with our partner.
Keep the workday to work hours - Too often working from home does not stay between the hours of 9 to 5. Over working can feel like a necessity but can often interfere with your relationship and ability to be there for each other.
Connect with a project - Plan a vacation when it is all over, repaint a room, clean out and organize the garage together, etc. Planning something to do together is a great investment in your future goals as a couple.
We can easily get frustrated with our partners. Try having a weekly check-in or chat to get on the same page and talk about what's going on with each other’s feelings. Discuss what needs to get done that week. Most importantly, ask for help when you need it. Let things go when you can. Let the house be messy sometimes. We can not do it all, everyday.....but we can be a team and do it together at a pace and in sync.
If you feel you may benefit from talking to our Licensed Marriage and Couples Therapist, please contact us. We are here for you.
Submitted by Gordon Gooding, LCSW